So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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