A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Randomize
