I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
