she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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