i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
