Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
