so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
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