The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
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