I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
