whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
