No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
