My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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