I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
