I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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