Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Someone came in the potted fern
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
that may or may not have been my penis.
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