All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'm just crazy horny about you
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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