That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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