The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
