That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
there is puke in my bra ... again
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
