vagina is talking i cant
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
