you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
