i just sent this text using only my big toe
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
