Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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