I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
