Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize