Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize