I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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