super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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