shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
