i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
