used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
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