If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize