that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
