So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
