so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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