Jerry, you need to find god
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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