Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Sorry about my life...
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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