I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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