...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
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