Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You can't just leave with hair like that
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
