I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Randomize
