Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
