This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
