People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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