i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I understand Curling. That high.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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