I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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