I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
