I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
