if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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