She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
