He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
